14 Jun 2010 2 Comments
I have to admit that before the Small Fry was born, I was sure that I would breastfeed until about 6 months and then I’d give him just pumped milk and formula. But here we are at 8 and a half months, still breastfeeding.
However for the past couple weeks, I was unable to pump as much breast milk as I used to no matter what I do. In the past, whenever I felt like my milk supply was going down, I would just eat lots and lots of oatmeal and I would be back on track in no time. So I have no idea what is causing this cessation of milk supply and I’m not inclined to fight it too much because maybe it’s just my body’s way of saying I’m just about done breastfeeding.
I finally decided to slowly cut out the breastfeeding figuring the Small Fry would just completely give up the boobs. Easy right? — WRONG! I was totally unprepared for the Small Fry’s defiance and the emotional challenges I’m now facing. I feel terrible when I hear him cry for the breast when I try to give him a bottle so I’ll give in because I know that he wants to nurse for security and comfort.
I honestly didn’t realize that weaning is almost as difficult as it is to begin breastfeeding. The Small Fry’s security object is me (and the boobs) and he’s not going to give it up without a fight. So hubby and I devised a plan that he would gradually take over bedtime and will establish a new night routine that I’m not involved in, and hopefully the Small Fry will be less defiant about not being nursed. For the mean time, I will cherish these late-night nursing as long as they last because as much as at times, breastfeeding is difficult, I wouldn’t trade it in for the world. I feel so blessed I got to my 6 month goal and I feel like my son and I formed an extra special bond because of it.